Sorry it has been awhile but I saved up a couple of good ones…
Slammin: I put Scrabble Slam on the kids’ Christmas wish list. I thought it would be a great game, right? Work on the kids spelling? Have fun? Right? So here is how the first round went...
TOOL
POOL
POOP
POOT
TOOT
Yeah, I think my kids new how to spell POOP without anyone shelling out $19.99.
Hot: I had just gotten out of bed when Marty came in and gave me a hug. The boy has a seriously distorted perception of temperature; he only takes cold showers because he doesn’t like the “hot” water. Anyway, he gives me a hug and says, “you’re hot”. I tickled him and then he says: “Get away from me, you hotter!”
Me: “No honey, that hottie, not hotter”
Marty: “You… are a real Hottie!”
Nuts: During a Saturday lunch, Marty wants to know what the ingredients are in the Honey Mustard dip for his chicken. Figuring it was pretty self explanatory I read the label out loud. As soon as I am done, Sarah cuts in with:
S: Phew! I was worried that there were nuts in there!
Me: Why?
S: My friend Robbie is allergic to nuts, he can’t have any.
I already knew this and considering that Robbie was not having lunch with us, I wasn’t sure why she was suddenly so concerned. I must have looked confused or worried because she suddenly has a very sincere look on her face and she tries to assure me:
S: Not the private parts (pointing down to her lap), the eatable kind…
I swear if she had even the slightest hint of sarcasm in her voice, I would have taken her to task but she was absolutely serious.
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