Hillbilly Babies

Okay, let me say that this happened several weeks ago but is still hilarious to me! My girls, ages 11 and 9, have had the "talk" and they have a working knowledge regarding the female reproductive system. My son, age 6, not so much. This will be important later. So, sitting around one day playing on the couch, Marty starts smack talking me.

Marty: That's right, I'm your mama! I'm your grandma! (I guess this means he is better than me? 6-year old smack talk isn't always as effective as they intend it to be.)

Me: Sorry buddy, unless you have a uterus, you are none of those things.

Sarah:*snicker*

Marty: Huh?

Sarah: (doing a little dance with her hands running up and down the length of her torso)That's right baby, cause I got overalls!

Me: You mean ovaries?!

ABBA-cadabra

For those of you who are ABBA fans, this will be funnier.

I was cooking dinner last night but I was afraid it would take too long to cook and be ready for the kids to eat before bed. I knew that we had some chicken tikka (a very mild Indian dish) left over from a dinner with my brother so I figured that it would be my fall back. After a while of cooking, the natives became restless and started asking about dinner.

Mary: Mom, what are we having for dinner?
Me: Well, if I can get it done, then we will have this turkey. If not, there is some chicken left over.
Mary: I will just have the chicken.
Me: Oh, yeah? Did you like it?
Mary: (singing) Chicken Tikka tell me whats wrong…

For those of you unfamiliar with the song, the actual lyrics are ‘Chiquitita tell me whats wrong’. Now I will never be able to listen to Chiquitita without thinking of Indian food!

It is not the first time that my kids have made up their own versions of ABBA songs, however, and strangely enough it always seems to center around food. About two years ago we went out to Dairy Queen with the grandparents and kids in tow. As we walked down the sidewalk I hear from behind me:

“Cause you are the Dairy Queen, young and sweet, only seventeen”

This Dancing Queen rendition (by I believe Mary once again) was accompanied by the appropriate amount of dancing.

Too young to worry about money

Paul and I were explaining to the kids that we were not going to take some of our normal trips this year due to Paul pending knee surgery and the possible effects of sequestration hanging over our heads. Later that weekend, the kids noticed that the squirrels were on the bird feeder again and started thinking about ways to keep them off. It was very cute and they were really putting some thought into their ideas then my 6 year-old son says, "yeah, but money is tight right now so I don't think we will be able to do any of those things". The solemn expression on his face and the forehead gently resting in his hand just added to my snickers.